I'm going to to step out of my 'life is always good face' and share my real week with you. Maybe because it has been so invasive and permeates everything right now that I really don't see anything else to write, so this week you get some of the 'other side'.
Let me start by saying I'm ok. Things are good and on track, one more assignment to go and I'm free to work strictly on my MA project. (thesis/dissertation depending on which country you are in....) I plan on making the deadline for this last one as well. If I didn't have enough stress in my life, my body decided that I needed it upped a notch, or maybe the stress of things is the reason for it, or it is a symbiotic relationship, I'm not really sure. About 6 weeks ish ago, not really sure when but it has been a while, I felt a sore spot on the back of my head that felt like I had hit it on something, but I hadn't. (trust me on this) The spot didn't go away. in fact after a while, there became a bump there. It became extremely tender to the touch and then it started to throb. Last Saturday not only did it throb, but my head felt like it was full of cotton and my ears started to ring. During the family chat one of my daughters asked me point blank if I was ok. I couldn't lie..... I was then told to call the Dr or go to ER or whatever they have over here. I honestly had no idea what they have here... after all of my children gave me "the lecture" I decided to figure it out.
So I looked online and after hours you call 111, the non emergency number. They ask a list of questions (some of them quite strange) and then they determine whether you should go into A&E or not (I think it stands for accident and emergency but it is basically the ER). Because at this point now my vision was semi blurred and I was a bit dizzy they told me to call a friend or a cab and go in and not take the bus.... the bus would have been faster, but whatever. (In the meantime two of flatmates were now giving me 'the lecture' and that my health is more important than deadlines and schooling. I suppose.... ) I finally tracked down a friend with a car and she dropped me off at the hospital and pointed me to the right door. It took me a minute to find the registration desk, she sent me over to a group a chairs in the corner next to a room that had "triage nurse" over the door. I was informed they would call my name and determine my need. The wall said that I was sitting in an area for people on the scale for 3-5 emergencies... in other words not dying or bleeding or unconscious. After about a 20 min wait the door opened and I was called in. Chris, the triage nurse, asked a few questions, felt the bump on my head, questioned why I had decided now (late Saturday night) to have it looked at... no vitals were taken, or history, just questions about why I was in. He gave me paracetamol (aka tylenol) and ibuprofen and basically told me to go home and call my GP Monday. It was going to be over a four hour wait (It was now 9pm) and if it had been going on that long I could probably wait for Monday, but they can't turn anyone away and I could choose to stay or go, so I went.
Sunday I took pain killers and carried on as normal. I had an assignment of 4000 words and 80% of my grade for a module due Thursday, so Monday I did what all Uni students do, I ignored my head and worked on the assignment. By now my ears are pressurised, numb to the touch around them on my face and jaw with a constant "white noise". High frequencies are gone and everything is muffled, but at the same time obnoxious noises like bells, buzzers, and loud noises and the like are intensified to the point of being almost painful. Ward choir was interesting on Tues because I could only sort of hear the parts and the piano sounded really loud. The high end is not only missing but is replaced sometimes by an almost electronic kind of squeal sound, which comes and goes when I talk, so that is a bit nerve racking. The choir has no idea that I couldn't hear them correctly, and well, I didn't bother to tell them. What I could hear sounded ok, they sing tomorrow, so that should be fun.....
My flatmate who is an audiologist gave me the evil eye for not calling the GP and made me promise to call Wed. So I did. I called as they opened and managed to snag a same day appointment. The bump is on the outside just under the skin and seems to be filled with fluid. He put me on a dose of antibiotics to see if it will clear it up. (we could lacerate it....) He said it should not be causing anything internal, but hopefully this will clear it all up. I've seen improvement for the pain on the spot and the size of the bump so hopefully it will continue to improve, but my ears haven't changed much if at all. My ASL skills won't help a whole lot here...... Sitting in my room quietly working on my assignment isn't too bad, going out in public is entertaining because I can't hear very well, but at the same time loud sudden noises are intensified. I keep trying to pressurise my ears, but it's not working. If it is an ear infection wouldn't the antibiotics clear it up? I have a feeling this is going to take a while to figure out, so in the meantime I go back to ignoring it and live my life. Stepping down from the soapbox....pity party is now officially over.
It has given me a greater appreciation for what I do have. My hearing I have never taken for granted having worked with the deaf and hard of hearing for most of my life. I'd rather it not remain like it is currently, but if it does I will adjust. Is it stress? Maybe. Is it an infection? The jury is still out. Am I crazy and it is all in my head? I've figured I've been crazy for years and yes, it is definitely all in my head.
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